New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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