I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
