Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
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