Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
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