The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
