What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
