i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Holy sore nipples Batman
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize
