I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
me + whiskey = a bad person
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Randomize
