I'm lost and stupid without you.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
