I want to stick my p in your. b.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
