I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
