everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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