The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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