You smell like a Billy Joel song
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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