in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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