the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize
