That's intense
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
