did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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