she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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