Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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