do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize