if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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