You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
