Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
