Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
this beer tastes like vomit already
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
