I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
