I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
