She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
