id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Randomize