real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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