Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
