It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
