Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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