my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
