This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Need sex. Gaining weight.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
