I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
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