I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
