Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
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