plz talk dirty to me
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
