I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
