I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
