Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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