I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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