It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
