FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Let the clothes fall where they may.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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