So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Found the puke drawer
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Still dying that you shit outside
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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