so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
