Christians are straight up FREAKS
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Are my feet made of real feet?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
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