Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize