hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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